I never did trust the banks. Fearful of burglars, I weighed up the alternatives. Under the mattress was far too obvious, as was the tea caddy. No, I needed something smarter.
I was wandering through a craft fair when I spotted it; a hidden compartment hollowed out of a log. It even had a clever wooden clasp that looked just like the end of a branch. It cost only forty quid, so I bought it.
We never lit the fireplace so it was perfect, or so I thought until Auntie Mary came visiting.
We came home to a roaring blaze.