The new Doctor Who, a dwarf named Malachi, stood in his portaloo on the edge of Brighton Pier. His assistant, Sile, sat on the only seat watching him.
Malachi thought for a moment and held up three fingers, then changed his mind and showed only two.
Pointing to indicate that she was correct, he made a box shape.
“TV series … The X-files! That was easy, Malachi, now lose your shorts.”
“How the hell did you get that?” he protested.
No matter what game they played, he always lost.
“Easy. You’ve still got the hots for Gillian Anderson.”