SuperNannies ™

 

Genghis Khan Junior, a direct descendant of the great Genghis himself, sat on his portaloo trying to get a few minutes of Me time.

It wasn’t easy having eight wives and fifty-three children.

He’d hoped to recreate the good old days and go raiding with his warriors, but his wives had recently found feminism and were demanding to come along. After all, they were also descended the great Khans and loved nothing more than a bit of excessive violence and pillaging. It was in their blood.

They were tough women. Some of them could flay you alive with nothing more than their tongues. However, Genghis’s cunning plan to take over the world and become the next great emperor was stifled by the common dilemma; Who was going to look after the children while the adults went out and had some fun?

They’d tried taking them along, of course, but you could hardly get your armour on before someone needed to go for a pee-pee. The older children were even worse. They’d been so long out of the saddle that they’d forgotten how to ride, and spent the whole time whining about losing broadband reception, and would there be enough gig width where they were going?

They’d hardly left the valley when some bright spark would ask, “Are we there yet?”

He was halfway through his crossword puzzle when the solution hit him. It was due to Seventeen Across: “Au Pair?” The answer of course was simple: babysitter.

Everyone needed one, but with a hundred and fifty seven grandchildren to look after, such a thing was not easy to come by, especially with the poor broadband reception they were currently getting in this isolated mountain valley.

And it was thus, that the world largest and most successful franchise company was created, SuperNannies™: A drive in people-minding service where incidentally, could also supply you with a decent burger, fries, and a coke at the same time.

SuperNannies™ took your loved ones at all ages. “From naughty to double naughty,” was their motto.

There was an additional surcharge for menstruating teenage girls due to the increased incidents of irrational attacks on the employees of SupperNannies™, but this surcharge was offset by the 20% off offer for teenage boys. SuperNannies™ also offered a very competitive rate on O.A.P’ on weekday afternoons.

In fact, the service was so popular that people regularly forgot to collect their loved ones in a reasonable time. In the end, the company was forced to bring in a maximum stay-over rate, with heavy tariffs being charged direct to your credit card if you left your loved ones there for more than three days at a time.

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